The Fine Art of Avoiding the Spiritual Hospital

I grew up in a working class, “lunch pail” neighborhood of Detroit. I’m proud of that, not bitter. Don’t get anxious, this column has nothing to do with guns or presidential politics, although it does touch on religion. In my neighborhood a kid had to at least pose as a tough guy or he was a target. Most young men learned to fight -- with boxing gloves on and with them off. Fights on the street were frequent but few people ended up in the hospital. That’s because we understood the fine art of ending a fight with both guys saving face.

This thought came to mind over a script I’m editing. It’s a sequel to our short film Feel the Joy and contains some combative exchanges between evangelical and progressive Christians. I’d written this some months ago and as I read it I wondered if maybe I could soften it a little, find some way -- at least in my script -- to end the fight with both sides saving face. Easier to do in a script than in real life, of course.

For years I worshiped, studied and taught in what you might call a “mixed” church. We had people conservative in theology and politics mixing with dyed-in-the-wool liberals. We managed to get along because we made tolerance of each other’s views a prime value. And let’s give credit where it’s due, this is harder for conservatives because they are naturally more structured in their understanding of truth. Sometimes in a pointed discussion the only way out was finally to just say nothing.

What we never did was question the legitimacy of the other person’s faith. This worked because we all accepted that individuals must seek, knock and find on their own or their path into God’s presence won’t produce the joy and assurance God promises. If a person has knocked and they believe God has opened the door, who are we to say God hasn’t or that it wasn‘t a true door? This for us was the fine art that kept us from sending each other to the spiritual hospital.

I wrote in this space recently of making a pact of acceptance with each other. We usually think of truces or peace treaties as being two-sided agreements. But now I’m thinking, why wait for the other side to be ready? Since I’m certain of my place in God’s heart, they can’t hurt me. Why not just accept those who disagree with me, even if they don’t volunteer to join the pact? I could just trust God that they’ll eventually come around.

I like the feel of that plan and I think that’s what I’ll do -- with God’s help. I’m tired of fighting with my brothers and sisters in Christ.